When was the last time you did something just for you?
I sometimes talk to people and they tell me that they have to go “here for this person or they have to do this for that person”, but I hardly ever hear them say I need to do this for myself, and I sit and wonder why?
Doing things for yourself is not selfish, it’s called self-care and it is important in order to remain healthy; physically and mentally. We do not always have to do things for everyone else at the expense of our own happiness.
This is a lesson that took me a long time to learn, but once I learned it, it made a huge difference in my life. They were times when I am invited to go somewhere, or I’m asked to do things and I simply say I’m sorry I’m not able to do that. I don’t feel that I owe anyone an explanation as to why I cannot or will not do something or go somewhere.
It may sound harsh to the other person because you’ve always done things for them or gone places with or for them and they just expect you to continue to comply. But it doesn’t have to be. Simply saying I’m sorry I cannot, is the only answer you really need to give someone. Will you enjoy saying it at first or will they enjoy hearing it up first? No, it will not be comfortable however when you make it a habit to start taking care of yourself, others will notice that.
It may change the relationship dynamic that you have with the other person, but when you start to take care of yourself, you realize that people who are in your life are truly in your life to be supportive and will understand.
I challenge you, the next time someone asks something of you and you’re not 100% comfortable or do not have time for their request, say no thank you I’m sorry I cannot do that right now. And then take that extra time and reflect, read a book, or go for a walk.
Taking time for you is not selfish it is self-care and that is important.
P.s. If you were having trouble saying no, thank you or I’m sorry I cannot do that right now and taking care of yourself. I encourage you to reach out and set up a time to talk about how you can make your self-care more important in your life.